week-end

its a last sunday week-end story!
mum's habit, she woke up at 6 in the morning (if weekdays, she woke up at 5.30)
such a morning person. lol.
.
not to early in the morning, mum had prepared us breakfast (literally she put nasi lemak on the table properly bought by ayah at warung nearby the flats),
not long after that, ayah went out and pick up kak cik from her workplace (and brought roti canai..hahaha..cause this week, all are here. Full house! and we are certified food junkies when it comes to nasi lemak and roti canai in the morning! Arghhhh caloriessss)
.

after light chit-chat during breakfast, we started to immerse with our things. Nap (lol(?), playing games, newspaper and magazines reading, watching TV and youtubes,
.

next in the afternoon, we went to my cousin's wed. he's the 1st grandson in ayah's family side. since this is the chances to meet all, so we are going there to cherish the moment. lol. (I try to upload more pictures but why la it doesnt came out?)
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 next after settle down there and salam all the people, we went home and ask ayah permission to hang out together (we,  the sibs) and ayah approved! Yeayyy!

ya,  thats the good idea i think to hang out with the kiddos since we always hang out with mak ayah.. Hahaha.. i mean young people somehow went out just to stroll around. its a wanderer thing. Kahkahkah..

so we took the grab and vroom!

truthfully, i have the best sibs ever. and Alhamdulillah we are meant to live together. seeing them happy is my aim for this life. we try to talk often, sharing knowledge, exchange life stories, giving opinions, be an active listeners, and helping each other.

Thank you Allah. 

Such a bliss.

hope to always in Your Rahmah. 

i love my family, lillahi taala. 

random (again?)

the fact that i'm finding a man with stable emotion, rational, opportunist, always have beautiful thought, good thinker, sabar, loyal, got leadership skills are not a joke. i meant it and never stop praying.

for me,
a wise man never leave you behind, not even in the sorrow. he will care, guide, helps and love you to bits.

change!

too often, we find ourselves been doing the same things, an old, comfortable routine every weekdays, even on the weekends.
the days start typically by having a breakfast, scrolling down the internets, whats the news for today, listen to light music, television as the kickstart for the day.

who dare to challenge doing changes in life? go beyond comfort zone? find and brings the joy of happiness and give meaning to others?

i often talk to myself, this lately.
i must change.
i need to change.
if i want to live a good life, better than yesterday, i must do something.
Change! And go exploring!

Find something that filled with so much wonder that i'll never get bored too easily.

throwback yesterday..kekeke

Hajj rukun in simple explanation for the kids!

zoom this to get read all the things.

ngehehe.

Sokay,

i'll ease you by retype what i've written on the paper.

So 1st thing first to get it done in right steps (we put checkpoint) :

1) Miqat : where you are putting on the ihram and niat to perform Haji. I teach the kids niat in Malay.

Then,

2) Tawaf Qudum : its welcoming Tawaf (Tawaf selamat datang). The 1st Tawaf you've done when you reach Mecca (at Kaabah). After they done tawaf, i explained to the kids, they will perform solat 2 rakaat at the tomb of Prophet Ibrahim (near the Kaabah)

Next,
the journey of rukun Hajj continued by doing the Sa'i. They need to pass 7 times between Mount Safa & Mount Marwa. I put Zam-zam water (actually plain water) just to make them feel the real hajj where people get to drink zam-zam along the pass.. They are calling aloud the Talbiyah (on day of Tarwiyah)

After that, i bring them to Mina. We stop here on the way to Arafah. Pray, read Quran and doing lots of dzikr. Subhanallah walhamdulillah wala ila ha illallah wallah huakbar.

Then,  we went to Arafah for wuquf and asking for Allah's mercy. Never stop praying. Khusyuk and Tawadhuk.

Next,  to the Muzdalifah. The kids doing action performing the Maghrib and Isyak prayer and pretend to sleep.

Then,  they are going back to Mina for stoning the devils and recite Bismillahi Allahuakbar on each pebble at Jamratul Aqobah.

Suppose they done tahalul (sacrificing animals,  cutting hairs ) - but i just explained to them in theory. Lol.

And lastly,  we went back to Mecca and done the Tawaf again.

p/s : i'm writing this with the real feeling in Mecca.

May Allah ease us to be one of His guests. Aamiin.

Lol.  kinda plan. 

Alhamdulillah we've made this. Bravo teachers! 😘

Hajj simulation #Part2

We, all the teachers have done the hajj simulation for Kafa Students. we are explaining the every each Hajj rukun steps for them. Hopefully they understand it well from Miqat until Tawaf again. 

p/s : i'm doing the explanation in each video. but sorry because of the arrangement are not in a right steps.

they are now Hajj and Hajjah.. hehe. Alhamdulillah.

together we pray to be at Mecca to perform Hajj one day, aamiin.

Hajj simulation for kids #PART1

THE KIDS done Miqat, niat ihram -> Tawaf Qudum at Mecca (suppose to solat sunat 2x at Prophet Ibrahim Tomb) -> Saie,  Safa to Marwah -> went for Arafah for wuquf -> Mina (recitation Iqra',  Quran) -> a night in Muzdalifah (action sleeps and wake up)  -> went to Mina again, done Jamratul Aqabah,  stoning the devil where each pebble they said BISMILLAHI ALLAHUAKBAR -> tahalul action -> went to Makkah and tawaf again.

delay

how experienced you are,
how knowlegeable you think you are,
have u appointed a question who do you think you are?
me?
 i am nothing and an ordinary people. nothing special. no superpower. no sixth sense. i'm the one who trying to be better day by day.
i read more. try to push my myself to learn and understand more.

i now learn to free the mindset, be a good listener and advising myself to delay the judgement.

every people have their own space and privilage to speak out about theirselves.
by giving the privilage, let them explain themselves.

as what we think, what we see with the naked eyes may differs from the reality they hold.

never focus only the surface things without trying to understand.
little do we know how people value things around them,
the importances of keeping in touch together,
the way they understand whatever concept in life.

one day, some other time,
those people will be the reason to our smile with invisible tears,
that time when days passes, months and years..
where everything become rare, strange and distance apart,
the memories of 'ol time may dragged again..
IT WAS THEM THAT I HAD THE BEST DAYS OF LIFE WITH.

little

yes.
all we need is little patience.
little more times.
to adapt.
to have a deep thought.
to study and trying to gauge where and what topic should we heading for.
.

things are all messed up.
its cruel, to just leave and come back again.
human have heart, feelings.
unlike dolls, except Annabelle. They haunted you!
.

success

.

i'm not a teacher.
i am intermediary and helps children to know more.

i assist them with Allah's blessing and rahmah

i'm happy and enjoy doing this.
stress will always there.
but
in the end i love it.

What is your index of success?
.
is it
Happiness?
Lot of money?
Fame?

women vs men?

nowadays, u tell me..
women had conquered most of men's career field. name it. pilot? we got pilotwomen. engineer? we also have it. mechanic? yes there are. soldier? Fighter? there involved women too. In fact, women now own the world. say, we can do whatever men can do. thus, do we need to claim this as GENDER EQUALITY? what are we trying to proof to? Women are not weak! Yes. we are not weak but,
WOMEN you don't have to be so much powerful over men,

Arrijalu qowwamuna 'alan nisa'

Allah says in the Qur'an, 

Men are caretakers (qawwamuna) of women, because of that through which Allah has favored one over another, and because of what they spend of their property (Qur'an 4:34). 

Allah had raised our level (read : refer to me, us as women) to the better place (understand as high level).
We will never be alone. Men must care, guide and respect us!

Islam has mould the good guidelines to ensure women never be the one who abandoned.
who did not follow the guidelines is the one who wronged!  Not the religion.

Men must do the favor of giving nafkah zahir & batin, support, good place to live and good clothes to wear, etc
in fact,
women can inherited the properties with qadr. there you see, how special we are as women.

the things are, we sometimes feel so pity to let the men prepare all the things just to ensure we feel comfortable and happy , hence we try to ease the burden.

we overcome the lack by ourselves. that is tolerance. tolerance comes from good communication. you both men and women must facilitates clear communication. declare the stuff,  understand and accept the matters that we need to work together for raising a better life.

Gender equality issue is something that i can't brain.
Feminism? I don't understand this too.

as for me, we both need each other very much.
we rise together and live harmony.

The other matter about the bad man who become woman-beater, who tend to treat woman as an object,  you moron! you pissed me off.

But trust me,
we cant reproduce a baby without the combination sperm and ovum is it?
be a good mum when you have children.
Teach them with love. tell them how beautiful Islam it is.
InshaAllah. Allah will help us to protect our family.

#pleasenooffense
#thisaremyhumbleopinion

chance

i breath this morning. Alhamdulillah. Allah wants me to survive again and more.
kickstart kaw this early am.
mak out of sudden made us nasi lemak for breakfast. lol. JANNAH for her. never failed to be a good mum. we stay together, not helping each other cause we noe we have to do this (read : everything)  together. everyone noes the role well even sometimes tend to ignore but they are very straightforward and outspoken. no hard feeling. hahaha..
you made mistake, someone will say it out aloud and potpetpotpet giving advise.
i love this way. since been absorbed this for a long time. outspoken is good, for a people who used to live that way. but not all people used to get along with that.

i wake up this morning, still remember what my ayah's boss said to me :

Young lady, you've done too many things until you lose your mission. Stop this bullshit and get focus!

i do love this kinda advice. hahaha.
#enigma
#mymoodcanchangesuddenly

measure

we must measure the level of understanding -the person who are we talking/interact to : its a must.
to ease the conversation.
to ease the discussion.
to make the things/informations/explanation went smooth and on point.

i never concern about this before. i tend to talk to show how smart i am. its very annoying.
that bad?  yes that bad. not about exposing the true colors, but thats the reality. *cakaptaknakkalah* lol..

time by time. when my circle start wide, where i start to mix around with random people with various thoughts, i mean not so random but new people come from diverse backgrounds and career field, then i start to reflect my way, my habit..why so childish? I questioned myself.

i talk without fully understand the point that i delivered to. no syncronization. not fully preaching. useless.

i took brief hiatus.

how i can adapt to be a teacher when i was an executive before?

the level of understanding between adults and kids are totallllllllly different.

the kids can easily hear you when you know how to tackle their heart with the good way. asking them politely, gently and talk the things that they can easily absorb.
its your willingness. to lower down your level of understanding and explain them using easy words.

and now,
where is the willingness?
why so ego?
measure first then you'll know the efficient way to deliver your points.

talk with brain and good niat.
then you'll have courage and sabar to handle whatever respond you get from the people you deliver your words too.
that is my point.

by the way,
i open with any advices and different opinions.
😉

daily expenses

how you manage your daily expenses?
cook by your own? tapau? eat at the restaurant?
What is the way or habit when you are buying stuff? Looking for quality? Quantity?  At least the thing you can use? Long-lasting? Hahaha..

.

i love how zati manage her expenses.

she convert the expenses into percentage.
for her, the taste of chicken might differ if you go to kfc compared to food court, however you can still feeling full if you eating the chicken at the food court and you spend less..

well it's sokay to reward yourself, but every month?  No. That shouldn't be. it's not the reward. It's nafs. lol.

so for this month's salary, i start to manage my daily expenses by converting it into % and saving more.
Save save save.

Go dalila go!

clerk

clerk case.
usually common in med field.
you have to clerk the patient. jot down the point that may helps for further diagnose. especially their disease history, their brief background, life practise and why they end up coming to the clinic/hospital.

make them comfortable with us before we start to touch them as check-up procedure.
work with attitude. create good social interaction with the patient.

dealing with people are different with robot, machines, dekstop and other objects that have no feelings to consider or concern.

thats how the things in business.
approach the prospect with good attitude.
create good relationship.
respect and know who are you talking to.
you are going to convince them not to force.

the thing is they skip the approach, and hard selling forever.
stop being mean.
i hate it.
if i going to buy, i'll buy it.
dont annoy me.

different people may have different way.
its just i prefer soft approach.
talk with manners.
start with salam.
end with salam.
through the conversation, explain to me, what and why..enlighten the things..

making investment isnt such an easy part.
you have to think that the investment worth every penny you pay for.

be a seller with attitude.
the art of approaching people maybe written in the books,but for me its the thing to explore and understand.
i'm learning too.
and i have my weakness too.

but,
i try to ease you by telling my preferences.
not only in the business.
its holistically.

i prefer soft approach. talk with heart. explain with heart. in the honest way you can give.

in denial

tense.
the situation tense.
no such both sides are going to explain, to ease the discussions cause the feeling of i'm good, i'm in the right path were there.

not to accept any truth, reality, listen and figure out the problems.
both are in denial mode.
in own mindset.

cold.
the communication sucks.
useless.
cant understand well.
the context not firm.
the emotion takes part.

drift me away.
lol

the thought

Alhamdulillah.
Another day.
Another chance.
I wake up in the morning,  as usual.
emak's siren so effective.
my habit, easy to wake up but too lazy to straightaway do the necessaries. i'll take a min (or more) to scroll down the socmed. pretend being busy in the morning, checking here checking there..hahahaa..toooo drama queen,
cause the thing i'm doing every weekdays are a routine..where you can easily predict the time ur sister coming out from the bathroom, how long she takes to finish doing all sorts of her necessaries..and u can always adjust ur own time to meet the cut off prep before ayah start to take his car key and going down to start the engine..
its bored but to keep things optimized, i keep doing it, everyday.

The things that motivates me every single day is i want to do good things. Be a good one. Say the good one. Show the good one.

Lately, i was not in a good situation.
There were too many things coming in the same time. I lost in giving priorities.
Nothing worse, still can handle it well but the air is kinda weird i dunno how to fix it.

I always asked myself. Am i too ignorance?  Too lame,  too blunt to understand others' feeling? Too selfish?

This is all about myself.
chaotic.
i try to redefine life. the future i want to design by my own.

how i wish i can be such tolerant people. can easily accept the differences in giving opinions, slow down and think before i start to deliver whatever things i want to say, to reply by understanding not just to make the things dont drifted away.

i need more sources. to change this life. to be the better one.

Yes.
i need to change.

How i handle different people with different approach.
adapt with the changes.
but able to grab the opportunities as well to keep myself in a good social standard.

long silence.
i'm finding the way.

knowledge gap vs attitude

it takes different deals yet the common root for the answer to overcome it is the initiatives. voice out. pushing them to the limit.
.
initiatives bring us to different level.
initiatives made us differ from common people.
.
knowledge can increase if we have initiatives to read more, learn more.
attitude can change from bad to good, from good to better if we take initiatives to lower the ego, be a good listener, think thoroughly slow down and have a gut to fix it.
.
we are nothing. living in this world, temporary and the taste of bliss is the little thing that we always concern.
.

i'm open with the criticism, advices, but i cant deal with sarcasm.
its hurt. and sometimes i tend to rebel.

• Gosh!

playing hard to get

that doesnt sound awful, cause p-h-t-g is part of engagement between opposite sexes..lol..

you dont give yourself too easy for a man u dont even know well -esp his true feelings, his loyalty ehhmmm..


i got this problem of differentiating as going out for catching up or can we call it a date? Special one? Or if i expect that, do i misunderstood the air?


should i ask this straightforward? or shouldnt and let it naturally go by its way?


its not a warn by the way, but me, are not easily satisfied. maybe i was the one who being chased before and not the one who chased.


the role start to change 360° and i dont have any clue. i've tried twice and the thrice one (plan doesnt came out well, haha) but it doesnt give massive impact plus i feel soooo helpless.

not to initiate any conversation.
cause the feeling ' hey girl is that the only thing you can say to him? you fool! say something smart, ' began to curse myself.

this kinda play hard to get keep adrenaline rush. keep the insecurity feeling away. i need to get back on track.

'bear the lost and gain the new chance, choices and change!'

am i giving up?
hell NO!
things had just started. but i lost in the middle of the stuff.

• can handle it or not?

.

long silence. I don't have the answers.
it's about wait and see.

night

i look outside by balcony.
seeing the night sky.
let the guards down.
taking a deep breath.
the stars. blink.
magnificient.
the light air and the wind brings me to calm and serenity.
this is temporary before the sky turns bright in the morning.
let me immersed in this feeling before the reality hits.
just let me be.
and i'll be fine.
.

finally

Alhamdulillah we've made this time. No proper plan. Because we've plan before but never make it real.
I dm'ed her and ask her to go out just because my plan to Johor cancelledddd.. So frustrating..
And luckily she say yes!  Alhamdulillah.  Little did i know,  this is the bliss where i cant go for nadea's reception yet i can met my long lost friend where last i met her during our old time in matric,  mashaallah.. ALLAH's plan so much better than mine.
Since she promised to come after Zohor,
I got me-time (so excited i came to NU at 11 am). Grab sip of coffee at starbucks (not that because i used to go here but i just want to taste that new flavor,lollll it cost rm19.60 demmmm! Hahaha. *ikatperutuntilgaji*)
.
That time, when i was all alone, i text akmal with no reason asking him, weh kau dekat mana blablabla and he said , weh aku dekat nu jugak and i was like lol, dah tu kau dekat mana ni, he said he was going to watch the movie with le girlsss, alaa akmal he is very friendly, my friend since the 2nd day during campus time. so i met him, this is accidentally meeting. bokbekbokbek and then i call zati (my friend who promised to meet me after zohor), but she didnt pick up ,later she texted me and said she might late. so i said sokay and i'll get a ticket of movie while waiting for her..hahaha..
There you are, i cant follow akmal cause he was watching annabelle with the girls. Omagaddd.. I just cant.
.
I'll make my way by myself and start to concentrate watching the movie.
Its THE BATTLESHIP ISLAND movie!
i thought this is English movie..lame me..i dont even google the synopsis, just remember that morning i read one of the person i followed in instagram about her rating for this movie.
Lol in the middle of beginning of the movie, i saw korean font and start googling.
At that time, i feel like, ' i'm in the rite room or not?' lol
Lucky me!
Starring the movie are SO JI SUB & SONG JOONG KI!
both are my fav actors.
And its lucky too cause both my left and right sitting partner were the girl.
.
Right after finished movie sesh, say bye to my next left sitting partner, i move faster to met zati and went to MPH, the place we promised to meet.
.

i walk to weekly bestseller rack part and grab my very-want-to-own novel entitled BREATH written by Dr Beni Rusaini. God knows how much i adore him. Not his physical but his attitude, the way he treat his life, the way he shares his emotions.
He wrote with his heart.
.

i waited zati for almost maybe 15mins since i can read a page of Jack Ma intro part, walk along the business reading rack and..
.

" Dali!!"
Zati right behind me. We skip the shakehand part and hug tightly..
Allahuuuuuuu i missed you so much zatiiii..
.
And there the catch up meet up sesh begin.
We talk about past, what past had bring us now, relationships, future plans, advices, discussions, and so many more i couldnt explain how we can still get along well like an ol'time.
.

Thank you ti.
You noe i love you.
😘